My birthdays (I accidentally typed ‘girthdays’ which may be more appropriate!) aren’t such a big deal to me; I just consider it a day to pamper myself. Same ol’ same ol’ this year, my 58th birthday and I’m still so sick from changing medications for fibromyalgia.
This time, though, was different! My husband began my day by giving me a beautiful bracelet. I love it. This day, October 13th, I received a flower delivery, beautiful & funny cards, phone calls and text messages sprinkling throughout. My friends and family showered me with love. It was amazing. At the end of the day, my husband brought home fresh flowers! From beginning to end, this is one of the best birthdays, that are not decade transitions, I’ve ever had. There was no loneliness or sense of isolation. All the love is exactly what I needed. I thought to myself, “So, I can have a wonderful birthday even when I’m sick.” When I consider the pain & illness can’t be tolerated anymore and I weigh my options, this day just heavily weighted my scales in the direction of love and life.
p.s. I’ve been putting on makeup most days. Even if I feel like shit, I don’t have to look like it. Of course, there are days, sometimes lots in a row, where I think of blush or mascara and say, “Fuck it.”