Declaration of Peace

The cease fire of the armed conflict with myself outlines mutually agreed upon obligations. Both parties consent to: Disarmament to include insults, both real and imagined, self-doubt, pessimistic outlook, and any other efforts to injure. Revisiting the past will focus only on positive memories. Negative events are deleted and no longer available for review. BreathingContinue reading “Declaration of Peace”

The Purpose of Life

Purpose (def): the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists. Purpose creates meaning, offers a sense of direction and helps guide our paths, behavior, and goals. Purpose according to Google: Live and let live. (I think it’s hilarious that one can ask google what the purpose of life is,Continue reading “The Purpose of Life”

A New Way

My earliest desperate search for a life purpose or meaning, for which I could do great things, repeatedly and resoundingly hit a brick wall. The graffiti on that wall said, “breathe.” It took me a few years to understand that I actually had received my answer. All I needed to do was breathe. No bigContinue reading “A New Way”

Downshifting

For decades, I’ve been in overdrive. Go, go, go. Career in the early days, babies and books for my husband’s small business, working from home and raising up two boys, and then part-time work. My mom asked me once if I ever relaxed. Admittedly, I have a terrible time unwinding mentally and physically. Here IContinue reading “Downshifting”

The Best-Laid Plans…

Last week, I decided not to make daily plans because I was disappointing myself day after day. The intertwined difficulties of depression and fibromyalgia have brought me to a place I haven’t been to previously, my functioning impaired significantly for several months. It’s now eight months since I collapsed under the weight of suicidal depression.Continue reading “The Best-Laid Plans…”

The Fibro Ride

As tempted as I am to analogize living with fibromyalgia to the ups and downs of a rollercoaster ride, more ups would be required. It’s more like a ferris wheel. Eleven years after the onset and eight since the first of three diagnoses, I think I may be accepting that I am living with chronicContinue reading “The Fibro Ride”