
Back in November, in the midst of profound depression, I stayed in bed for a couple weeks and zoned out on binge TV, waiting for the meds to reach my brain. One particular show looked interesting; but when it started, the sound effects seemed extreme and discordant. I remember thinking it made the show unwatchable.
I’ve thought about giving it a second try, but recalled being overwhelmed by the noise in the intro. Just started it this afternoon, and there is absolutely nothing remarkable to hear.
Must admit, I found this fairly disconcerting at first pass, but it confirms what I’ve learned over the years – depression is not just a bad mood, feeling sorry for oneself, or being too weak to handle life. It is a biochemical illness that affects the whole body system in a variety of ways. Mental illness is an illness. No shame in that.
p.s. I guess there is a mix of sounds, ones that go with espionage, but nothing like I remembered. I was pretty careful about what I watched in those early days, strongly encouraged by my husband. He would say, “Watch something that’s good for your soul.”