SurvivingSara

Category: Uncategorized

  • Rock On!

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    In the spring of 1989, having failed to make a love connection with the date or the TV show, I decided to call the guy I’d met at the Hard Rock Cafe, the original one in Beverly Center. When I had breaks during the selection and filming process for Chuck Woolery’s dating show, Pam and…

  • What’s Love Got to do with It?

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    Love Connection continued…. Not long after filming a short video for the Love Connection TV show, I received a call from them. They’d shown three clips to a guy and he’d chosen me for a date. He phoned me to set up our outing. I don’t remember his name, which tells you how this worked…

  • Looking for a Love Connection

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    Having both been single for the past year and having had a great time together, my friend and I agreed it was time to take steps toward meeting new men. I was 24, Pam was 44 or 45, and we were in Southern California. She was interested in joining a video dating agency called Great…

  • Snow!

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    Florida pup’s first time in snow. Too good not to share! That’s all I got. Have a smile for the weekend. 😎

  • For Pete’s Sake

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    His smile and laugh are still with us, and I’ll never forget the last words I heard from my best friend’s fiance, “We love you, Sara” as I left to catch a plane back to California. 25 days later, he was gone. Lying in bed at a friend’s house in California, hanging out with a…

  • Thank You

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    A little over a year ago, I started this blog because I wanted to document my journey through this bout with clinical depression. I’ve had two prior battles so, even as I felt overwhelmed by darkness, I knew blogging through it might help others gain a better understanding of what depression is like. It’s become…

  • Refining Fire

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    For the life of me, when Anthony Scaramucci and Michael Cohen warned that DJT would burn everything to the ground if he wasn’t reelected, I considered it hyperbolic. Irrespective of the numerous opportunities I’ve had to learn not to underestimate the depths of DJT’s pathological narcissism, for some completely unsupported reason I once again thought,…

  • Politics vs Governing

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    [I wrote the following paragraphs as I continue to grapple with exactly what has happened and worry about what’s next. I got as far as I did but then thought ‘blah, blah, blah.’ The writing is accurate but not viscerally connected to the current turmoil. That’s what I want to explore. Posting this now. Next…

  • These Days

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    Well, 2021 is certainly a disappointment out of the gate with strange days I never thought we’d be experiencing in the USA. Since March last, the whole world has been suspended in uncertainty, every single person on earth, old enough to comprehend, simultaneously.What energy has been released and where the hell will it take us?…

  • Georgia On My Mind

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    How naive I was to think all of the hullabaloo would end after November 3, 2020, election day. It was going to be over, one way or another. We weathered the SCOTUS election decision involving W. Bush and Gore. We thought that was extraordinary! The winner was clear. President-elect Biden won both the popular vote…

  • Another Trip Around the Sun

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    There have been past years to which I was more than a little excited to say goodbye. But this, this ending of 2020, garners an international sigh of relief. Yes, we’ll all welcome 2021, hoping it brings with it a new day. The light at the end of the COVID tunnel seems to be on…

  • Dream a Little

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    What is life going to be like after widespread vaccinations? It’s doubtful we’ll snap back to where we “left off” before the pandemic. So many loved ones will not be with us. Many businesses haven’t survived and won’t be available. For me, although not involving COVID, the past year has been difficult with my physical…

  • Recalibrating Good

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    “Have a good day!” “How was your day?” “Hi, how are you doing?” “Did you have a good day?” What is good? What’s going on in your life when you’re pretty sure it will be a good day? How might a day unfold that results in you considering it a good day? For me, personally,…

  • Accept This

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    You know, the part of the Serenity Prayer about “grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change”? Many current circumstances provide opportunities to practice. I am endeavoring to accept these situations as they are: Pandemic Isolation Distance holidays Presidential transition Changes in plans as virus goes viral Fibromyalgia Chronic pain There are…

  • The Last to Know

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    (Revised 2:30 p.m. PST) Turns out ostriches don’t actually bury their heads as some kind of response to an unknown threat. Females dig holes for eggs. Mothers put their heads in the holes regularly to rotate them. This is the image that led to the reference of burying one’s head in the sand. Like an…

  • One Year Later – Hope

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    I just passed the one year mark of the day I wrote a suicide note and purchased the supplies necessary to carry out my plan the next day, the Monday before Thanksgiving. I thought about it briefly, seated at our holiday table a few days ago, with my husband and two grown sons, but made…

  • Thankful Tonight

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    There were empty seats at the table across America today, for a variety of reasons. Unfortunately, there will be a lot more people missing Christmas and New Year’s in the next couple of months. This is a certainty. Images of people filling airline lobbies and check-in lines, cars snaking through the freeways. Our frontline medical…

  • 9/11 on Repeat

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    For those too young to remember, this is what the Twin Towers looked like before we knew we were under attack by 19 radical extremist Islamists at the behest of Osama bin Laden, a name most of us had never heard. The world was transfixed as the towers collapsed, causing a cloud of debris which…

  • Disconnected???

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    Awakened to NO internet connection. Immediate response: It’ll probably come back in a bit. No big deal. 10 minutes in: You know, this is nice. It’ll be good to have a quiet day. 20 minutes in: Checking frequently doesn’t seem to help. 25 minutes in: Message my neighborhood group asking if anyone else was having…

  • What Is My Thing?

    —

    by

    Sara Z
    in

    You know how after a tragedy, people say no one knows what they’d do unless they were there. Well, here we are, nine months into a pandemic with millions getting ill and dying around the world. With the worst up ahead, we are in that moment. So, I started thinking about how I’m handling this…