SurvivingSara

Tag: Parenting

  • Note to Selves

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    Sara Z
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    To my high school self, class of 1982: You are enough. Even though your next older sister is a gorgeous cheerleader and model and you get so tired of hearing about it but, girl, you are so pretty. Only difference is she went to modeling school and you didn’t. Guys who compare you to her…

  • Parent is Also a Verb 12/16/24

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    Sara Z
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    Your child needs you to be the parent, not a friend. Of course, this meme is an exaggeration of a valid point. A parent does not need to be a diligent detective on 24/7, looking for lies or mistakes. In fact, that would be counterproductive to raising an independent adult who makes decisions based on…

  • Parent is Also a Verb (11/27/24)

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    Sara Z
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    Growing kids up – What’s the goal? On TV just now, a mother said, “I just want my kids to be happy.” This strikes a nerve, similar to parents being friends with their children. Parents should definitely not be friends with their kids. More about that another time. What about the end game for parenting?…

  • I Surrender

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    Sara Z
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    As the mom of two sons and no daughters, I now officially give up on Mother’s Day. I’ve been waiting for an unexpected, sweet celebration for 26 years. I’m a slow learner. In the early years, I was so excited! Would there be flowers? An outing as a family? It went without saying that my…

  • Parent is Also a Verb 3/14/23

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    Sara Z
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    Parent is a verb – until it’s not. At some point, the light turns red. Stop. Your job is done whether it feels like it or not, whether or not the results meet your expectations. Over the teen years, the parenting light should turn yellow. Our sons and daughters should be gaining independence all their…

  • Parent is Also a Verb 12/5/22

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    Sara Z
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    LESS IS MORE, I PROMISE! When my children were young, they were given many gifts. When you take into account grandparents, aunts & uncles, mom & dad and, of course, Santa; the number of presents under the tree seems to increase exponentially as Christmas nears. Little ones are teased by the accumulation. When can we…

  • Parent is Also a Verb 9/15/22

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    Sara Z
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    There is much more a parent can do to assist a child’s with education besides standing over them, making sure they do homework. True support for learning can begin early in life, before a child begins kindergarten. Helping your child build scaffolding will improve experiences in school and not just reading. Scaffolding? What the heck…

  • Parent is Also a Verb 8/28/22

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    Sara Z
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    One of the most important gifts a parent can bestow upon their child is resilience. Over the decades since the 1970’s, the message regarding the significance of self-esteem has certainly been taken to heart by many parents, and it is important, but some of the ways people go about strengthening a child’s self-esteem result in…

  • Parent is Also a Verb 8/13/22

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    Sara Z
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    Oh, but it goes so fast! Enjoy time with your little kids now. Before you know it, they’ll be grown and gone. You’ll miss these days later. And on & on & on. At a big box store about 20 years ago, my two boys, ages two and three, sat side-by-side laughing together as they…

  • Parent is Also a Verb 7/29/22

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    Sara Z
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    Do you want your children to always be honest with you? Do you, or will you, tell them that they can discuss anything with you, that your home is a safe place to share difficult situations? Be careful what you ask for. At bedtime, when our kids were young, I’d sing a ditty of my…

  • Do You Remember Me?

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    Sara Z
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    To my sons, There was a time I was active. We went on hikes after school, even though you couldn’t figure out “Why do we have to do this?” Watching out front when you went out to play in order to intercept fights with neighbors or general mischief. I did yardwork while you rode bikes…

  • Parent is Also a Verb 6/30/22

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    Sara Z
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    Dedicated to my late dad on his birthday. My sons were both encouraged to sign up for sports and other interests they thought might be interesting. The older one preferred to achieve his personal best in track and cross-country, while the younger enjoyed competing on a team, including basketball and baseball. In the early years,…

  • Parent is Also a Verb 6/19/22

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    Sara Z
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    Happy Father’s Day! When my babies were very young and we lived in a cozy starter house, my husband parked his work van in the alley behind our yard at the end of his work day. More than once, I stood watching out the kitchen window, calling my husband on his cell phone when he…

  • Parent is Also a Verb

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    Sara Z
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    My 14-year-old son was in for a difficult conversation. I brought him into my room, shut the door, and we sat on the bed. Me: Unfortunately, I’m going to have to share with you something I was hoping I’d never have to say. Son: My younger brother (name withheld) really is retarded? M: No. He’s…

  • Parent is Also a Verb 4/23/22

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    Sara Z
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    In the beginning, if you have any sense, you’re nervous about bringing that tiny, completely dependent, bundle of snuggles home. Now, you’re a parent. Some folks continue living life as they did before and add this new member as an aside. Others adopt the new role of mom or dad studiously, committed to doing everything…

  • Parent is Also a Verb (PAV) 3/17/22

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    Sara Z
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    Meaning of the word discipline: In OED and Watkins it is said to be from discere “to learn,” from a reduplicated form of the PIE root *dek- “to take, accept.” But according to Barnhart and Klein, it is from a lost compound *discipere “to grasp intellectually, analyze thoroughly,” from dis- “apart” (see dis-) + capere “to take, take hold of,” from PIE root *kap- “to grasp.” One phrase…

  • Parent is Also a Verb 1/21/22

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    Sara Z
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    When my husband and I brought our second son home, our first son was 19 months old. He seemed to barely notice the addition. As a stay-home mom, the first couple of years were full of parallel activities: feeding them both included breastmilk for one and fingerfood for the other, different size diapers needing changed,…

  • Parent is Also a Verb 1/14/22

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    Sara Z
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    Are you expecting your offspring to grab the keys and take off when they turn 16 or will you require they practice, take classes, and be tested so as to qualify for a license? We don’t just let our teenagers drive away because they’ve turned 16, although they may attempt to convince us that would…

  • Parent is Also a Verb 12/5/21

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    Sara Z
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    Let your love shine through, no matter what the circumstances! When you bring a little snuggle bunny home, it’s not hard to love unconditionally. It has to be unconditional because your baby has nothing to offer except spit up and terribly malodorous diapers. Luckily, loving them up does not require a good mood at 3…

  • Parent is Also a Verb 11/28/21

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    Sara Z
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    We don’t expect our babies to magically pop up on their feet and launch into breakdancing when they’re still taking wobbly steps, furniture surfing because they’re unsure. As they grow, we shouldn’t expect them to do chores or activities correctly if they’re not developmentally ready or we haven’t shown them how we want it done.…